You learn to hold your pee. You stay away from gynecologists, men, and the Holy Spirit. You obsess over Virgin Mary and proving to your mother that you’re still a virgin when she sees the dollar store brand pregnancy tests and deflated condoms - not from sex - but from experimental tests. Will it pop? You lufa the skin between your legs after a kiss. Scrub until your inner thighs are blood glazed. Praise god for tampons soaked to the string. Don’t shave. It’s nature’s condom. Wear shorts under your skirts. Never sleep nude. Never walk into a man’s room. Stay away from bar stools and public pools. Drink your liquor hard, like antiseptic. Anger God. Don’t ask him to close your womb. Dare him to.